Homepage
Bookstore
More free online Bible studies
Questionnaire: How Well Do You Serve Your Spouse?
Questions to Identify Your Husband's or Wife's
Key Desires and Needs
(c) 2001 Doug Britton (Permission granted to print for personal use)
Serve one another in love (Galatians 5:13).
The importance of meeting your spouse's desires and needs
The Bible tells us to serve one another. After reading the following verses, read Philippians 2:1-21.
Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave--just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:26-28).
In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive'" (Acts 20:35).
Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness (Philippians 2:5-7).
To have a great marriage, you must have the heart of a servant. To be a good servant, you need to know what is important to your husband or wife.
Ask your spouse to fill out this questionnaire
Dear __________________________________ (your mate's name),
Please help me become a better spouse by filling this out.
- Write a score of 0-10 on each item. "0" means this isn’t very important to you. "10" means this really matters to you.
- Draw a smiley face beside the things you think I already do well.
- Circle the three things you would most like me to work on.
How important is it for me to:
Score (0-10)
____ Show more interest in Christian activities.
____ Pray with me regularly.
____ Spend more time with Christian friends.
____ Tell others, together, about Christ.
____ Speak courteously.
____ Speak quietly.
____ Be supportive when I make a mistake.
____ Criticize me less.
____ Praise me.
____ Express appreciation.
____ Show forbearance.
____ Express love.
____ Encourage me.
____ Trust me.
____ Demonstrate respect.
____ Let me talk with friends without interrupting.
____ Include me in conversations with friends.
____ Be on time.
____ Admit your faults and ask forgiveness.
____ Forgive me when I do something wrong.
____ Spend more time with me
____ Talk about important issues more often.
____ Tell the truth.
____ Share fears and hurts.
____ Listen to me.
____ Respond seriously to my concerns.
____ Make a budget.
____ Be financially responsible.
____ Spend less time watching TV.
____ Spend less time on the phone with friends.
____ Touch and hug me non-sexually.
____ Be romantic (give love notes, flowers).
____ Do fun things with me.
____ Go on dates with me.
____ Dress up for dates.
____ Help with the children.
____ Do housework or other chores.
____ Do home repairs.
____ Work in the yard.
____ Cook delicious meals.
____ Decorate the house.
____ Help with shopping.
____ Support me when with family members.
____ Earn more money,
____ Be more responsive to my sexual advances.
____ Initiate making love.
____ Be more active when we make love.
____ Other (specify) __________________________________________
____ Other (specify) __________________________________________
____ Other (specify) __________________________________________
Click below for more information
• Laying a Solid Foundation (Book 1 in Marriage by the Book)More resources
• Making Christ the Cornerstone (Book 2 in Marriage by the Book)
• Encouraging Your Spouse (Book 3 in Marriage by the Book)
• Extending Grace to Your Mate (Book 4 in Marriage by the Book)
• Talking with Respect and Love (Book 5 in Marriage by the Book
• Improving Your Teamwork (Book 6 in Marriage by the Book)
• Putting Money in its Place (Book 7 in Marriage by the Book)
• Fanning the Flames of Romance (Book 8 in Marriage by the Book)
• Group Leaders' Guide for Marriage by the Book
• Bookstore
• Homepage
• More free online Bible studies on daily living
• Free e-mail newsletter